advice Archives - Stephanie L. Jones

Giving February 23, 2018

Send an Encouraging Text

I recently started writing articles for a police magazine and I submitted my second article today.

My husband is my proofreader and after he read the article he sent me the texts below. They totally made my day!

My husband is as honest as they come and if there was an issue with my article he would have said so.

Even though this gift only took him seconds to send, it set my mind at ease that what I wrote was worthy of publication.

I struggle with confidence issues as relates to my writing. Being dyslexic adds a layer of stress because my grammar isn't the best and I make mistakes that I can't see. I proofread everything over and over! At some point, I say a prayer and hit send!

So you may not think a "kudos" text means a lot to someone but you never know what insecurities they are facing. If we build each up with our words, we'll also build up the self-esteem of others.Who in your life needs a little encouragement today?

Blessings,

Stephanie

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About the Author:

Stephanie Jones and her husband, Mike, live in Northwest, IN and enjoy lake life and travel. Stephanie is the author of The Giving Challenge-40 Days to a More Generous Life (on sale NOW!), a speaker, life success coach, and a daily giver. Stephanie empowers people to change their life through giving.

You can contact Stephanie by email at Stephanie@GivingGal.com

Giving June 25, 2016

Are You Ever a Brat?

I was a brat! Yes, there I admitted it. I have those days where I’m selfish and don’t want to give a gift!

Let me back up and give you the story. It was after dinner, and my husband was CRAVING ice cream. He asked me to run into town and get him some. I immediately said no. We bantered back and forth, in what seemed like forever. I finally said NO, NO, NO!!!

He was annoying the heck out of me. I reminded him that one of the reasons I married him was because he didn’t annoy me. I know it sounds crazy but before Mike most guys just annoyed the heck out of me after a couple of dates. I can spend hours upon hours with Mike, and he rarely gets on my nerves. I guess that’s a good thing since it’s just the two of us, no kids or pets to occupy our time. I just love hanging out with him, which we often do. But on this day he was driving me bonkers!

Finally, he realizes he isn’t getting ice cream, heads upstairs to hop in the shower and yells, “Will you at least make me some brownies?”

I took a deep breath and said, “Sure.” It would be my gift for the day.

As I was making brownies, I thought, “Stephanie This isn’t a gift. Your heart isn’t in the right place.”

I finished the brownies, and he was grateful I took the time to make them, but I was feeling guilty I had been such a brat!

The next day, while at Target, I picked up some of his favorite ice cream. I may have been a day late, but this gift was bought and given with the right intention and a cheerful heart.

Many times in life we get an opportunity for a do-over. Take that opportunity. Don’t be stubborn to prove a point. Do the right thing, and in the end, everyone wins.

Blessings,

Stephanie

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About the Author:

Stephanie Jones and her husband, Mike, live in Northwest, IN and enjoy lake life and travel. Stephanie is a writer, speaker, life coach, daily giver and the author of The Giving Challenge: 40 Days to a More Generous Life. She challenges people to live their dreams, discover their gifts, and do amazing things.

You can contact Stephanie by email at stephanie@GivingGal.com.

Dreaming Big June 19, 2016

7 Things I Learned From My Father

A few things I learned from my father…

1. Spend time with your kids, lots of time. Take them hiking, play in the backyard, read with them and play games. My dad took us to the park at least once a week. My sister and I now have a love for simple, inexpensive adventures and love the outdoors.

2. Attend their sporting events and be their biggest cheerleader. Don’t criticize the coach if your kid isn’t getting playing time and don’t be loud and obnoxious from the stands; it’s embarrassing for your child. In the four years of my high school athletic career, my father never missed a basketball game or track/cross country meet. He expected two things, (1) Hustle and (2) 100% effort.

3. Make your kids work, and work hard. From a young age we were picking up sticks in the yard, doing chores, stacking wood, and I had my first job at 13. Guess what? It didn’t kill my sister and me, and I have never been unemployed. At times I’ve had two or three jobs to pay the bills, but it didn’t matter because my dad taught me hard work is how you become a productive member of society and get the things you want in life in life, even though “things” have never been important to him. He taught us we are not entitled to anything.

4. Show love and affection. My dad has never shied away from hugs, a kiss on the cheek or an I love you. I’m 38, and if I’m at my parent’s house, there’s a good chance in the evenings you’ll find me snuggled up with my dad on the couch watching tv.

5. Find a common interest. My dad and I have always loved to be in nature together, talk investigations and politics, and there was a time we did 5ks and even a biathlon of shooting and running.

6. Get involved in your community and set a good example for your children. My dad was a firefighter and police officer. He’d help anyone in need. Heck, yesterday he stopped for a broken down motorcyclist. The guy was an outlaw with a pistol on his side. Dad offered him water and pointed across the street to his house and said, “If you need anything I’m right over there.” I thought he was crazy, but he just responded, “I’d expect someone to do the same for me.”

7. Vote, respect the flag and honor and be grateful to those who have or are serving in the military. Not voting has never crossed my mind because my dad has taught me the importance of living in a country where it’s people are allowed to vote. From an early age, I was taught to be silent, not move, place my hand over my heart and not take my eyes off the flag during the national anthem. Many men and women fought hard and died so the flag could fly free. If you ever drive by his house, Old Glory is proudly displayed on a huge flagpole in the front yard.

If you haven’t gotten the point, my dad is pretty amazing! My guess is many fathers could learn a thing or two from him. Happy Father’s Day dad!

If you know a new father or one that could use some pointers, please share with them! Their children will thank you!!!

Blessings,

Stephanie

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About the Author:

Stephanie Jones and her husband, Mike, live in Northwest, IN and enjoy lake life and travel. Stephanie is a writer, speaker, life coach, daily giver and the author of The Giving Challenge: 40 Days to a More Generous Life. She challenges people to live their dreams, discover their gifts, and do amazing things.

You can contact Stephanie by email at stephanie@GivingGal.com.

Dreaming Big November 3, 2015

The Best Advice I Received Working for the Indiana State Police

Do you ever wonder why out of the millions of conversations you've had over your lifetime; there are several that remain front and center in your mind?

I was twenty-four and working for the Indiana State Police as a grant administrator and personnel officer. I enjoyed my job but wanted more. A good friend of mine from high school was the head coach at a large school district in Indianapolis. One night we were talking and he offered me a job as the distance coach for the high school girls track team. Since running in high school and college, it was a job I had always wanted, but there was one problem...my day job was a BIG obstacle.

When my friend asked me to consider the position, I immediately thought, "There is no way I can make this work. I would have to leave work two hours earlier than I leave now. My boss is not going to go for it."

But I really wanted to coach!

After several days of being in agony on what to do, I sought counsel from Major Medler.

He had always given me good advice. I shared with him my dilemma. His response changed my life. He said, "Ask. The worst that is going to happen is that your boss is going to say no. But at least you'll know."

After my conversation with Major Medler, it took several hours to get the nerve and "pop" into my boss's office. He was also a Major, but he intimidated me. I hem-hawed around and finally he said, "Stenger (that was my maiden name), what do you want?!"

I stuttered, "Well sir, I have been offered a coaching position. I'd really like to do it, but my current hours won't allow for it. Would it be possible…for me to…um…come in early and work through lunch so I could leave at 2:30?"

Whew...I had done it. I was bracing for the worst case scenario when he said, "Will this affect your work?"

More confidently I responded, "No sir, no it won't."

He grinned and said, "Okay, you can work an adjusted schedule and coach. Have fun!"

I wanted to give him a big bear hug, but that probably wasn't the most appropriate response. I thanked him continuously as I backed out the door. I could have done the Irish jig down the hallway, but no need to draw attention to myself. I couldn't believe it! I was going to be a coach. A dream was coming true!

Over the last 14 years, I have never forgotten that lesson. There are hundreds of opportunities I would have missed out on for the fear of hearing the word no. You know what I learned? That most of the time...people say YES! People want to help other people. People want to give other people chances.

This has become second nature to me, but I thought of it today when I was watching Katie Couric interview Elizabeth Banks. It seems like someone gave her good advice years ago also.

What have you been scared to ask but fear hearing no? Comment below or send me a message. I would love to encourage you as the Major encouraged me so many years ago.
Blessings,
Stephanie